At Boots we know how precious your memories are. That’s why our experts only use the highest quality materials before carefully hand checking every photo

This text, from Boots’ photo print envelope, suddenly tickled my cliché antennae when I saw it the other day. I realised I’d seen hundreds of variations on the same device – and written a fair few too. It was such a shock that I decided not to mention the two missing hyphens in the copy.

The formula goes like this:

At A, we know how important B is. That’s why we C, which gives you D.

Where A is the brand, B is a customer’s (presumed) concern or priority, C is a feature and D is a benefit (although Boots have decided, foolishly, to miss this last part out). Vary phrasing as required and season with cheesy adjectives to taste. And there you have it – instant reader empathy!

This formation has become a cliché, which never helps. But it’s also unsubtle and clunky. Consider the same technique in another context:

As your mum, I know how cold your hands get in winter. That’s why I bought you these fleece-lined gloves, which will keep you warm and toasty, take up minimum space in your handbag and dry quickly after washing.

As opposed to:

I saw these and thought of you!
(PS Ring your sister)

To generate empathy, you need to make the implication ‘I have your interests at heart’ or ‘I understand the problems you face’. However, this has to be done with great care; a light touch and an indirect approach work best.

First off, leading with the brand name is just nuts. Ascribing personal human feelings to a corporation, or even a group, kicks credibility into touch from the outset. Social media madness tells us that brands or even entire countries can be our best friends, with feelings and beliefs, just like real people. But no-one in the real world believes all that rubbish.

As in my frivolous example, it’s rarely necessary to doltishly point out who’s talking anyway. The presence of a logo or even just the format and occasion of the piece is enough. Look at the actual Boots envelope – the logo is present, so why say ‘At Boots’? (Answer: because the content is corporate boasting rather than advertising copy.)

This change leaves us with:

We know how important B is. That’s why we C, which gives you D

But is ‘we know how’ really needed? The key point is that the customer knows it, not the brand, or whoever is supposed to be talking. And who is talking, anyway? It’s not a trusted friend or relative; the text is being read off a website or poster or whatever. There’s no need to foreground the artificiality of the communication by positing an implausible or ambiguous ‘we’. Which gives us:

B is important. That’s why we C, which gives you D.

The ‘that’s why we’ link can be taken out, again to avoid introducing an ill-defined and distracting authorial voice:

B is important. C gives you D.

Now we’re getting somewhere. Freed of all that self-indulgent, self-regarding waffle, we might actually be able to sell somebody something. Let’s try an example:

Making a will is essential for preserving your family wealth. Our professionally written wills minimise your tax liability after death.

It’s admirably tight, but the tone is far too confrontational. Readers will be put off, even if they agree with the premise. It needs to be softened up a bit – but with gentle third-party authority, not branded boasting:

You’ve probably heard how important it is to make a will. Maybe your friends have already done it. It’s by far the best way to make sure your wealth stays in your family. We’ll give you all the help and advice you need.

By alluding to a shared experience or perception, we can gently introduce an idea that will resonate with the reader, but without bashing them over the head with it. Cosying up to the reader is more effective than getting right up in their grill and telling them what they think.

Using ordinary, conversational language is essential. To check for natural tone, trying reading aloud – nothing exposes pious, pretentious language better.

If you succeed in generating empathy, you can go easy on the brand-mentions and the selling – just evoking warmth and understanding in the vicinity of the brand is enough. In this context, when the call to action comes, it simply makes sense – it’s sensible advice from someone who understands. And who wouldn’t act on that?

The phrase was ‘at your fingertips’. Few would dispute its status as a cliché. It appears in Catch-22, which was published in 1961 (‘Lieutenant Scheisskopf had the facts at his finger tips’) and was surely familiar even then. So it’s clocked up a good half-century of use in print. A Google search turns up over 10 million results. By any measure, this is a familiar figure of speech.

I don’t want to rock clichés. But they’re making my readers buy

I was writing about a portable electronic device, so ‘at your fingertips’ had a literal relevance (unlike Joseph Heller’s metaphorical usage). But there’s no doubt that the phrase is what George Orwell called a ‘dying metaphor’ – a worn-out figure of speech that has lost its capacity to add colour to writing. But what could I say instead? Go literal and say ‘within easy reach’ or ‘close at hand’? Or informal with ‘right there where you need it’?

The problem is that none of the alternatives carries quite the same meaning. So I can avoid the cliché, but only by sacrificing clarity. Is that really a trade-off I want to make?

The project I was working on was a B2C landing page selling stylish electronic products as Christmas gifts. Traffic was to be generated with an AdWords campaign. For my money, there were three key perspectives, all relating (naturally) to the audience rather than me or the client.

• Mindset. Once they’re at a landing page, we know the audience is interested, motivated and actively searching for the product. They’re not in ‘socialising’ or ‘surfing’ mode. So there’s no need to ‘interrupt’ them, grab their attention or try to generate interest ex nihilo. They are, in effect, a voluntarily captive audience.
• Profile. People have different levels of literacy and vocabulary. For literate readers, ‘at your fingertips’ is painfully crass. But for others (my target audience), it’s a useful signpost. They don’t read a lot of books. They don’t analyse every ad they see. They’re short of time and buying presents is just ‘one more thing’. I need to inform and persuade, not entertain or intrigue. Trying too hard won’t add value, and could do harm. 
• Resonance. In terms of tone, I’m trying to involve the reader. So I want my words to be warm and welcoming, reassuring them that they’re in the right place. There’s no call for anything edgy, surprising or challenging.

In other words, I believe the cliché was the right choice for the task at hand (or at fingertip).

As copywriters, our aim is not to express ourselves, but to serve the interests of our clients and their customers. We choose the words that bring those two groups together for mutual benefit. Creativity and originality may be appropriate means to that end. But it’s our duty to do what works, regardless of whether we like it ourselves. Copywriters are servants, not artists.

But (you object), surely creativity and originality are worthwhile in themselves? My personal answer is ‘yes’. But that’s because I’m university-educated and aesthetically sensitive (in theory at least). And the idea of ‘worth’ is a value judgement that has nothing to do with what works commercially. If I want to be creative, I should do it on my own time. (That’s one reason why this blog exists.)

Anyway, why do clichés become clichés? Because they’re so useful. Orwell exhorted his fellow journalists to comb through their text for over-familiar idioms and replace them with something newer and fresher. But this misses the point. Clichés endure because they serve a unique purpose. Like favourite cardigans, they get worn out precisely because of their appeal.

To sum up: if a cliché is the right tool for the job, the conscientious copywriter goes right ahead and uses it.

1.    Solution n. No, I do not just write things for money. I deliver content solutions.

2.    Partnership n. We work with you, not for you. See also co-operation, relationship, working closely/hand in hand with.

3.    Proactive adj. Always trying to upsell the client in the name of ‘helping them achieve strategic objectives’? You’re a truly proactive partner. Always going the extra mile.

4.    Synergy n. What is released when two proactive solution providers work closely in partnership.

5.    Tailored adj. Configured to and shaped around your individual requirements, like that dent you’ve made in the sofa. See also bespoke.

6.    Flexible adj. Remember Access? He was ‘your flexible friend’. And, if you’re a B2B copywriter, that’s what this word is too. See also adaptable, scalable, futureproof, customisable, configurable.

7.    Robust adj.  You’re offering me a technical solution, are you? Well, I hope it’s robust. (Always puts me in mind of a chunky robot.)

8.    Innovative adj. No, it’s not just new. We are blue-sky thinkers, and we’ve been throwing some shapes. That’s how we deliver innovative solutions.

9.    Integration n. And how would you like that, sir? Seamless? Very good sir.

10. Strategic adj. Use it to say ‘big and clever’ without sounding like a six-year-old.

11. One stop shop n. Just like a department store, but with a diverse range of in-house capabilities instead of saucepans and jumpers. See also holistic, cradle-to-grave, comprehensive, under one roof.

12. Expectations n., pl. So, as a proactive, strategic partner, what do I do with these? That’s right – I exceed them. (Probably through continuous improvement.)

13. Key adj. Meaning ‘critical’, ‘central’ or ‘priority’, but shorter and snappier than any of them, and therefore done to death. (By me. I admit it.)

14. Added value n. The more I use it, the less sure I am what it actually means. Something to do with sums maybe, or tax?

15. Agile adj. Like a sure-footed mountain goat grazing on scrubby Alpine grass. Or a robust technology solution. See also responsive, flexible.

16. Modular adj. A modular solution is one that grows with you, supporting your strategic development. (Not one that wears Fred Perry and rides a Vespa.)

17. Dynamic adj. Everyone uses it. No-one knows what it means. Go on, define it. You can’t, can you?

18. RoI, Return on Investment n. Le roi est mort. Vive le roi! And long live this indispensable acronym too – it can make anything sound all financial and serious.

19. Competitive advantage n. Plough through 592 pages of Porter and get clear on what this actually means. Then stop using it. (Hint: it doesn’t mean ‘doing things a little bit better, quicker or cheaper’.)

20. Leverage vt. Yes, it’s a verb now, not a noun. Now leverage your core competencies and make the tea.