Why saying ‘no’ is good for business
Helping a friend can often set you on the path to running your own business. You might help a friend build a website, or start walking your neighbour’s dogs. Perhaps you make some cakes for your son’s birthday, and a friend asks if you can make some for her kids.
And then you think, “Maybe I could start a web development/dog walking/cake baking business”.
Some of best small businesses I know started out this way – including mine.
When I decided to go freelance, I built any number of small websites for chums, and wrote copy for a lot of my friends small business. It was a great way to hone my skills with a forgiving audience and earn some clients for my portfolio. And my friends got my services at rock bottom rates, so it was win-win.
Throwing some work your way
Hopefully as your business grows your friends will send more work your way, either through recommendations or by asking you to work for them directly.
It’s always a good idea to reward your friends for any recommendations they give you. A nice bottle of wine, a crème egg or just a thank you card works wonders.
For good friends you may consider offering ‘mates rates’ (reduced prices) for your services to sweeten the deal, providing a small discount, or even giving them a little extra help for free.
You don’t have to say ‘yes’
Once your business is up and running, if a friend asks you to do a cut-price job it’s time to think about whether you can afford it.
I’ve had any number of friends ask me to do work at a fraction of what I’d normally charge, and for a long time I felt obliged to say ‘yes’.
In the past few years at least three ‘friends’ have asked me to build websites for their new copywriting businesses. (Yes, I’m a copywriter too.)
The kicker? They wanted me to do it as a favour.
Crazy huh?
But you know what’s even more crazy? I did it.
I did it because they were friends, because I wanted to help, and because I wanted to be nice.
But to be honest it just left me feeling a little fed-up.
Think about it. If a friend asks you to do a job for $400 when you’d normally charge $1000, you’re essentially giving them $600 of your earnings.
Can you really afford to be giving your chums cash handouts?
Or think of it another way. If you cut your costs for your mates, you’re essentially working for nothing some of the time. Those are extra hours you could spend exercising, playing with your kids, reading a book or just chilling out. But instead you’re spending them doing free work for your friend.
Embracing the ‘no’
Now of course you have to judge each project on its merits. If it’s a close friend and you genuinely want to help them, you may well say ‘yes’ to a lower rate. But if the call comes out of the blue from someone who sat four desks away from you at a job eight years ago, the answer will probably be ‘no’.
Working for free is dangerous. The boundaries disappear for you and your pal, and it will be almost impossible to start charging them later on.
Instead, explain your rates to them, and only offer a small discount if it feels right (and you can afford it).
Or just say ‘no’.
When it comes to friends, you’re better off saying ‘no’ than resenting the work you’ve done and destroying the friendship.
Saying no is good for business
One thing to be aware of: many of your friends won’t really understand what you charge, and will genuinely feel they’re doing you a favour. They won’t realise they’re asking your to give away your money, or that you have enough work already. So tread carefully. Manage expectations, be honest, and be realistic.
Don’t fall into the trap of feeling you have to help everyone. Because every time you do these jobs, you’re essentially making a loss.
And that’s not good for business.
Have you learned to embrace the no? How do you deal with friends who ask you to work at a cut-price rate?
Kate Toon is an award-winning SEO and advertising copywriter with over 18 years’ experience. She’s also a well-respected SEO consultant, information architect, strategist, hula hooper and Crème Egg-lover based in Sydney, Australia.
Comments (14)
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For me, it’s not really that black and white. I think free work, barter and mates rates are excellent for business, as long as they are handled with mutual benefit in mind. The problem is, a lot of people don’t understand how much work goes into what a freelancer does, nor do they get the level of attention and dedication a true professional freelancer gives to a project.
But if you get someone who knows what is involved, and you have your own strategic goals outside simply being helpful in mind, it can work, and work really well.
Hi Bek, yes I think the ‘people don’t understand issue’ is key.
Most of my friends don’t understand market rates and come to me with what they think is a reasonable budget of say $300 to write an entire website.
Previously I’ve found it hard to speak up and say, ‘no that’s not really enough’ and have done the work but felt a bit disgruntled (and often missed out on real full fee jobs).
I think as long as you feel comfortable with the arrangement then it’s fine. But you have to have a very clear vision of the value and your own business objectives.
Thanks for commenting!
When I first started out (and I’m still in the early stages of my freelance experience) working for friends for free helped build my confidence and my portfolio. As time has progressed my friends and I share expertise when we need each others help – it’s mutually beneficial and is treated more like ‘business’ relationship.
On the advice of a fabulous friend who spent far too long agreeing to pro bono work I’ve summoned my strength to quote work at cost for a close friend… who took absolutely no offence and who told me she wouldn’t have accepted a mates rate anyway.
It does take courage but true friends do understand that friendship to one side, it’s all about business.
I agree Sophie, at the start it’s a great way to build confidence. And when you have that confidence you need to be confident enough to ask for payment! Now I explain that I don’t offer mates rates, friends understand. They’re either happy to pay the full whack or I pass them onto a an associate. No broken friendships yet! Thanks for commenting.
Such good advice! And yes it’s very important when you are starting out and need testies and experience but once up and running you have to get tough!
testies? Ah, I get you ;-). Yes, it’s a little harsh but fair!
The prize for cheekiest ‘friends’ goes to the copywriters who asked for you to do their websites. Wow. I hope you did a shit job 🙂
Ha yes full of typos. No I did a good job. More fool me. But you live and learn.
I think it’s particularly hard for copywriters because anyone can write, right, so how hard could it be? My wife is a photographer and has the same problem. Sometimes a quick look at your rates page will help friends and family realise that your time = your money.
Yes copywriting is a doddle! Sadly I don’t have a rates page, for various reasons. I think anyone who works for themselves can face this problem. Plumbers, Dog Walkers, you name it. People will always ask for cheapies or freebies. Thanks for commenting Steve.
Knowing what I do of the way these things work, I would always offer to pay full price to a friend to make sure I got their best service. While it’s nice to get something for cheap, or even for free, it’s a double-edged sword if you end up waiting ages while they take care of paid work first – which is entirely understandable. If I’m buying a service, I don’t want to be in a position where I don’t feel I can criticise what’s being delivered.
Even then, it can be tough to voice criticism to a friend, which I suppose is an argument for working with someone else if you think there will be discussions over quality etc.
Great article Kate and totally agree. When I started freelancing I was blessed to have friends that paid full-price and recommended me to everyone they met, which was actually a huge boost to my business (and my confidence!) but I can see how the lines could get blurry!
That’s a very good read. likey very much.
I think it depends on one’s general revenue and client base. If revenue is high, then a discount for a friend should be fine IMO.